Pharmacy Phollies: phun and phunky
At its April 22 premiere, “Pharmacy Phollies ’09” went all “Breakfast Club” on an appreciative audience of School of Pharmacy students, faculty and staff.
Dina Patel, president of the class of 2010, and Meghan Hall, class historian, introduced the film, which was simulcast on the Inova Campus.
The Phollies have been a School of Pharmacy tradition – intermittently, depending on whether they were considered politically correct at the time – since at least the 1960s. The live version gave way to video about the same time camcorders hit the market.
While the production values have grown ever more sophisticated, the same cannot always be said of the subject matter. As one anonymous faculty member commented, “They always seem to spend a great deal of time in the bathrooms.”
Here’s our take on this year’s “Pharmacy Phollies”—and a shout-out to all those talented individuals who made them possible:
- Most dizzying handheld camera technique since “NYPD Blue” debut: Whoever filmed the opening pharmacotour sequence. Seriously, it put Regal Cinemas’ roller-coasting concessions ad to shame.
- Best use of music written for a film made before many SOP students were born: “Don’t You (Forget About Me)” as recorded by Simple Minds for the 1985 John Hughes coming-of-age-fest, “Breakfast Club”
- Best tongue action while keeping a straight face: Megan Danford in “Thanks, Physical Assessment!”
- Best parody of killer printer scene from “Office Space”: Jon Carter, Greg Hicks and Joey McKloskey threatening and then demolishing a poor, defenseless microwave (extra props on the slo-mo).
- Best use of Smith first-floor restrooms: “Fiesta del Bano” with its burrito-serving, song-singing, TP limbo-ing gaggle of pharmacitas. No wonder the hombres were jealous. Note to students: “Extreme Makeover: Bathroom Edition” is just an e-mail away.
- Best pharthlete ever: John Sattler in “Who Was That Guy?” The better question, however, is “How Did He Not Break a Leg?”
- Best pharmacy-related (and surely nonalcoholic!) drink name: Inovatini.
- Best looking-bored line delivery: Will Hernandez, Inova Campus student services coordinator, smacking gum and grinning up at the camera: “With only 29 students, there’s not much to do around here.”
- Best pop culture reference to a tune even older than “Don’t You (Forget About Me)”: Group performance of “Don’t Stop the Treatment” to the tune of Journey’s 1981 rock classic, “Don’t Stop Believing.”
- Best argument for staying in pharmacy school and giving up that “American Idol” dream: Group performance of “Don’t Stop the Treatment” to the tune of Journey’s 1981 rock classic, “Don’t Stop Believing.”
- Best faculty homages: Tie! Between the DNR “conference” tribute to Beverly Talluto and Inova’s Michael Clarke golf-putting on the wrong color carpet.
- Best presentation of “MCV’s most successful dating service”: The ePharmony.com ad. Genius. (Except … did anyone notice that’s a real Web site? Please do not fill out a questionnaire.)
- Best pharmacy dance: Tie! Between Inova’s “Slumdoggers” and Holly Gurgle in “Punched!”
Be the first on your block to own “Pharmacy Phollies ’09.” DVDs are available for $5 by contacting Dina Patel at [email protected] or Teresa Nguyen at [email protected]. Make checks out to “Class of 2010.”
Categories archive